Im Not Emeril

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Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Closing This Blog, But The Door Stays Open RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

It's been almost 4 years now, since the day I began this blog. It's been great and I've really enjoyed spending time with you guys, my readers, for all these years.

Although I'm closing up shop here I'll still be around. This blog and its archives will not be removed. I have some grander plans and a move to a new site is the first step on that road.

The new blog has a working title of "Eschew Obfuscation", though that is subject to change.

Come on over and check out my new place. I hope you'll be just as comfortable as you have been here, well, some of you, anyway. The rest I intend to make as uncomfortable as possible.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Convention's Over. Thoughts, Part Two. Or An Open Letter To Ken! RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

Cross posted at Eschew Obsfuscation

From the moment I walked into the Colosseum on Saturday morning, I knew it was Ken Cuccinelli's convention. To most of the delegates, selecting Governor and Lt. Governor candidates and a party chairman was secondary. For them, nominating Ken was job one.

I was impressed with the organization Ken has put together. And I'm sure it will only strengthen in the months to come. Congratulations Ken, from a John Brownlee supporter, on a job well done.

Now the tough part begins. It's easy to get the support of those who reside on the right side of the conservative spectrum. Those who are involved enough to pay real money to travel across the state to attend a political convention. It's a bit tougher to get the more moderate. And tougher still to get those guys that have voted a straight Democratic line forever just because Granddad did.

A wise man once told me that any candidate comes into a race with 20% locked down. It's there. You don't really even have to work for it. That's true for his opponent as well. That means you have to convince the voters in the middle. You're both fighting for them.

So, you have to go out there and convince just 31% of the voters that you're their guy. Sounds simple. Only 31%. Until you realize that that most can't name you or your opponent. Sure, they know the finalists on American Idol, but ask them who represents them in Congress or the General Assembly and you get a blank stare. Or you get the name of the last guy they saw interviewed on CNN. They don't know him, they don't know you, and they don't really care.

Now, I'm here to offer a bit of advice. It's worth every penny I'm charging you for it, Ken.

The 9th district will be crucial to your success. I'm sure you already know that, but it has to be said anyway.

The Fightin' Ninth is full of folks just like I have described.

"Granddad was a Democrat, Dad was a Democrat, so I guess that makes me a Democrat. Sure, in a Presidential election I usually vote for the most conservative guy. I'm a conservative guy myself. But, by cracky, I'm a Democrat and I want my local guys to be Democrats just like Dad was."

Or so it goes.

You have to get more than 25% of these leftovers excited enough about you to tell their friends.

The next part may seem mean. I don't intend it that way. The way to their hearts will not be easy. Especially for a guy whose last name ends with a vowel. Face it, Cuccinelli is not a name heard around here very often. I suggest making "Ken!" a catch-phrase down this way. Perhaps they'll even begin to think Shannon is a sissy name. Stress the "Ken", lose the "Cuccinelli". Or shorten it to Cooch. At least down this way. Nothing personal, just the way folks in the coalfields think.

Oh, by the way, there ain't a lot of Catholics down this way either. We're mostly Baptists and Pentecostals. Regardless of political affiliation, probably as conservative as you, if not more so. Most are a bit leery of Catholics, though.

I'm afraid Brownlee was right when he stressed his prosecutor past. Shannon and his cheerleaders are already using it. And you've painted yourself into a corner on the triggerman thing. You can't switch gears now, so stress public safety any other way you can.

Spend time down this way. It worked for Warner. It worked for Kaine. It can work for you. Get to Martinsville. Not the speedway, though that won't hurt. (There is a great 4th of July event there each year. Attend it.) Get to downtown Martinsville. I suggest a Friday evening attending a T.G.I.F concert. Get in touch with Councilman Danny Turner or City Attorney Eric Monday, they can arrange it and they'll be good guides.

Get to the outlying areas of the ninth. Call Jerry Lester out in Grundy. Work with the Kilgores down U.S.23 from there, you know them, I'm sure. Get by here in Stanleytown, we'll work out an event for you here.

Abingdon, Bristol, Roanoke, and even Martinsville are important, but ignore Stuart, Hurley, Norton, and Bassett at your peril.

The Peach Festival in Stuart. If at all possible, be there.

Floydfest in Floyd. If at all possible, be there.

Poor Boy's Dinner in Galax. If at all possible, be there.

The Fall races at Martinsville and Bristol. If at all possible, be there.

You get the idea. It all comes down to six little words. When it comes to the ninth district, if at all possible, be there.

And finally, I'm here to help, use me any way you can.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Convention's Over. Thoughts, Part One RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

Yesterday, Sunday, was a busy day here. First I had to see Kilo off safely back to Wise, then off to Church. The afternoon was filled with the first graduation ceremony for our school, V.I.C.A. I got back home just as the race at Dover was winding down, (will Johnson get another championship this year?), then began preparing for other overnight guests on Sunday evening.

Already pretty wiped out from the convention, Sunday evening was spent in my favorite chair, kicked back and relaxing, with "The Fugitive" with Harrison Ford and Tommy Lee Jones.

Now, late in the morning on Monday, the first Monday of my Summer break, I have seen last night's guests off, I have the tractor started and am preparing to spend the next several hours mowing.

But first I want to recap the RPV convention of 2009.

RPV did a stellar job organizing this convention. The facility was great, the only complaints I have, and heard often from others, was that the registration area was very difficult to find, and many units had to climb to the stars in order to find their seats.

Registration was very easy, even though it took me two whole laps around the circular Colosseum before I finally found someone who could give clear directions. (Thanks John Brownlee.)

RPV's organization was once again evident on Saturday morning when Kilo and I found our way to blogger's row. We had the best seats in the house, even though I seldom sat. Kilo did a bit of live blogging, I preferred to visit and look for stories. Besides, what's the point live blogging an event where most of the people interested in the outcome are sitting right in front of you? Those who could not attend for one reason or another, (missed you Norm), could easily keep up with the RPV's own live feed as well as the hundreds of Tweets.

Lynn has a comprehensive list of Virginia bloggers who found their way on and off blogger's row here.

It takes me about 18 hours to mow this place, and I'm at least two weeks behind. I'll add part two later.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · RPV Convention 2009 Is Over RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

I just got back into Henry County. Let Bailey, my dog, go out into the yard and pee on stuff. He really seems to enjoy doing that. I'm about ready to kick off the boots and let the events of the day filter out.

I spent most of the day on "blogger's row". RPV really set up a great facility for us, with the expected glitches, of course. Nothing serious, just a tripped breaker here and there, but all soon sorted out. Thanks to all those who worked that area.

Even though I spent time on blogger's row, I didn't actually write anything while I was there. I did find a few stories to tell, but that will come later. Tomorrow I'll write up an analysis of the day and tell a few of the stories I came away with.

See you tomorrow, good night all.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Answers Please, Brian Gentry RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

A lot of to do going on about the infamous robo call. Yeah, I got it. Yeah, I immediately associated it in my mind with the Cuccinelli campaign. Right or wrong, I'm sorry, That's the way I called it.

Did Ken himself approve it beforehand? Not likely. Did Ken himself approve it immediately after it first aired? Possibly.

Is it a major blunder for the Cuccinelli campaign? Most definitely.

The man(?) behind it seems to be one Brian Gentry. A paid stooge for Bob Marshall in a previous campaign. At least Brian proudly claims responsibility for the weakly supported evidence on the website noted on the call in question.

A couple more questions before I get to my astute analysis.

Brian has called Bob McDonnell a "liberal". Brian claims that John Brownlee is anti-2nd amendment. Brian is an idiot.

Wait. Those are not questions, are they?

No. Those are facts. The few facts that can be discerned from reading Brian's website. There are few facts about John Brownlee on a site that purports to expose Brownlee facts. Many innuendos and suppositions, but few facts.

Back to those questions now.

Question one. Brian is on record as a paid performer for Bob Marshall. Does Brian have an equally long record as a Republican?

Question two. Is Brian a member of any Republican committee?

Question three. And perhaps the most important of all. Is Brian affiliated in any way with either the Cuccinelli or Foster campaigns?

Answers please, Brian. Or Ken. Or Dave.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · RPV Convention RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

It's the last week of school. Friday will be the last day of school, but I won't be there. Not for long anyway. I'll be leaving fairly early on Friday, heading to Richmond where I'll be a delegate to the Republican party's state convention.

Bob McDonnell will be our candidate for Governor. That has been long ago settled.

As delegates, we will have several items to decide. We gotta pick a Lt. Governor candidate. Easy. I'll get to that later.

We need to come together on a choice for Attorney General. This one is a bit tougher, but I'll get to it a bit later too.

And we have to choose a new chairman for the group, chairman of the Republican Party of Virginia.

The recent L'affaire Frederick being still fresh in everyone's mind, this may be the toughest choice as well as the most important of the weekend. In many ways this one election will set the stage for the future of our party in Virginia. Not only will this be a referendum on which of the two candidates, Pat Mullins or Bill Stanley, will lead our party, this is in many ways a referendum on the vision and leadership of our state central committee.

After dumping Jeff Frederick, in a manner that was widely criticized, the state central committee installed Pat Mullins as chairman. Pat may be a great guy. I don't know. The Virginia political expert I rely on to advise me on such matters does not know him either. He's a local unit chairman in the same congressional district as my expert adviser, but still unknown.

Bill Stanley, on the other hand is also a local unit chairman in my expert's district. I've met Bill Stanley. I don't really know Mr. Stanley. But I've met him, he's very likeable, he's a good conversationalist, and he seems trustworthy.

I've received many emails from Mr. Stanley, I suppose you have too. I've received one mailer from Mr. Mullins. I've also received one mailer from Stanley.

In his emails and mailer Mr. Stanley has outlined many innovative ideas and plans. Mr. Mullins has touted his endorsements. Endorsements are good. I'm essentially putting forth some endorsements here today. I like endorsements.

I like ideas and plans better, though.

Right now I'm leaning hard toward Bill Stanley. Before I can fully endorse him though, I feel it is only right that I actually meet Mr. Mullins. That won't happen until Friday afternoon at the earliest, so I'm tentatively endorsing Bill Stanley for Chairman. If that changes you'll be notified early Saturday before the voting begins. No update will mean that Bill Stanley remains my choice.

Now let's move to the easy choice. Bill Bolling is and will be our next Lt. Governor. I see no point in even mentioning his opponent's name. A solid conservative to the core, Bill, with roots in SWVA and a conservative record in Richmond that is unequalled, will leave the convention with 70 plus percent of the delegate vote. Bill Bolling has a proven record to stand on.
  1. A 100% pro-family voting record from The Family Foundation
  2. A 100% pro-life voting record from the Virginia Society for Human Life
  3. Endorsed by the Virginia Society for Human Life (2005)
  4. Supported parental notification and consent legislation, a ban on partial birth abortions and higher patient safety standards for abortion clinics
  5. Cast the tie-breaking vote to deny state funding to Planned Parenthood
  6. Fought to restore abstinence education funding that Governor Kaine stripped from the budget
  7. Led the fight to pass the Marriage Amendment
  8. Has opposed every tax increase proposed by Governors Warner and Kaine
Bill Bolling is my choice for Lt. Governor.

Now the tough one.

No question about it, Ken Cuccinelli is my hero in the Virginia Senate. When Ken first announced his intention to run for attorney general, I wholeheartedly supported that move. Remember though, that was when he was a lone candidate in a field that has since grown by two. Two other excellent candidates have since joined Ken in his quest to be our next attorney general.

Dave Foster is a candidate I could, (and will), support in the future. Dave will someday make a great Lt. Governor candidate, a great AG candidate, or even a great candidate for Governor. But not yet. Not quite. It's not that Dave is not ready. Instead, we as a party are not ready for him.

What I mean by that is the reason that John Brownlee has my enthusiastic support for AG.

My history with John Brownlee goes back to sometime in 2002 when he prosecuted my BOS member. You can read about that here.

There is more to my support for Mr. Brownlee than that though. As early as last Summer John assured me that he would not oppose Bolling for the Governor spot next. He promised to hold out if Bill Bolling decides to run for the governorship after McDonnell.

Our party has a line-up that is pretty much unbeatable for the next 12 years if, and only if, our candidates agree to work together.

On Friday I'll be asking both Dave Foster and Ken Cuccinelli their plans for the future should they win the AG nomination. Their answers will be posted here on Saturday morning.

Until then I don't see anyone persuading me to change from my wholehearted endorsement of John Brownlee.

So there you have it. For what it's worth, I'll be voting Saturday for the following;
  1. RPV Chairman; Bill Stanley
  2. Lt. Governor; Bill Bolling
  3. AG; John Brownlee
See you in Richmond on Friday and Saturday.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · School's Out For Summer RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

School's Out For Ever!

Alice Cooper said it in song years ago.

School's not really out forever, but for the next couple of months school's out for me. I'll be working with a couple of students on their summer school courses, and I'll be working on getting our newest campus in Ridgeway Virginia ready for next year. But I'll have much more time for frivolities like blogging in the next few months.

I'll also be launching a new Virginia political magazine this summer. I'm really excited about this new project. Similar in content to Jim Bacon's excellent "Bacon's Rebellion", but going a few steps further, I have high hopes for this new project. I'll keep you updated on the progress here. I have a couple of well known Virginians signed on as regular writers, but I need more. Please contact me if you would like to apply for a liberally unpaid position as a regular columnist.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Part One. Partisan Blogging; Leftist Edition RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

I've been pretty much inactive lately. Especially when compared to my early years in this blogging thing. I do still read many blogs. I do still get my dander up when folks on either side spread political BS like it was so much fertilizer.

The latest fertilizer spreaders I've noticed are Lowell Feld and that perpetual spreader, Waldo Jaquith.

Blogging.

On the surface, blogging is easy. Real journalism, now that's a bit tougher. I don't claim to do either, let alone one or the other particularly well. Both these characters claim, publicly or privately, to be experts at one or the other. Or both.

Let's examine a couple of recent "posts", as bloggers call an article, and see where they really come from.

Let's start off with Waldo. I'm sure you know Waldo, the cute kid from Charlottesville with a great smile and good hair. He's also got a really good looking wife and a pretty smart brother. I never really learned how to smile for a photograph, and I ain't got good hair. Oh, I got hair, just not much of it anymore, and what's there has gone really, really blonde.

Waldo recently "posted" what he would call an "article" about the "Global Warming Crisis". Yes, apparently Waldo is an Al Gore disciple.

Waldo has discovered an old report from the Global Climate Coalition, an enregy industry-financed group, that he says, decided years ago, that “the scientific basis for the Greenhouse Effect and the potential impact of human emissions of greenhouse gases such as CO2 on climate is well established and cannot be denied,”

Waldo does not include a link to the report he quotes. Oh, he does include a link to the New York Times report on the report, but once there you have to have really sharp eyes to find the link to the actual report.

Here you need to remember the quote from Waldo; "...the scientific basis for the Greenhouse Effect and the potential impact of human emissions of greenhouse gases such as CO2 on climate is well established and cannot be denied..."

There's more.(PDF link) Read the report yourself. NOTE: Unlike Waldo, this is a link to the actual report. Read it yourself.

Waldo could have included this link, but chose not to.

Read the entire report and you find that not only can man's contribution to climate change cannot be denied, you also cannot determine whether man's contribution will add more to global warming, or global cooling.

Read that again. The report does say that man's contribution to global warming cannot be denied. It also says that it cannot be determined whether or not man can contribute to warming or cooling. The report is also very careful to note that, although the hypothetical contribution by mankind to climate change cannot be denied, it cannot be determined how much or how little mankind may be able to contribute.

Sure. We may be able to affect the global temperature, but to what degree, and in which direction, no one can say.

Next, Lowell Feld and the recent Unemployment fiasco in Virginia.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · L'affaire Frederick RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

I spent quite a bit of time today on the phone with an RPV executive committee member in whom I have quite a bit of trust.

I will report in more detail on my thoughts concerning the L'affaire Frederick soon, it's being written, revised, re-written now.

H/T to JAB for the title.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Warner On The Democratic Process, Failing Grade RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

I've not written much on the Employee Free Choice Act before. I have, however, written about my thoughts on unions in general;
Any union, whether it be my old brotherhood the Teamsters, or my Grandfather's UMWA, or your local teacher's union, the VEA, is based on a single flawed premise. All unions are based on the concept that all workers are equal. Anyone who has spent a day on the factory floor, or a night in a mine, or a few miles on the road in a Freightliner knows that just ain't true. Even Dan, my beloved uncle, if he were to be honest about it would tell you that, given a choice, he would rather go down the road with Gary Martin than Roger Potter, two drivers I had the privilege to work with at that time. Yet in the eyes of the union they were equal. Horse hockey!
As a former union member, and an engineer working in two heavily unionized industries, I know a thing or two about unions and their organizing methods.

All's fair that ain't ruled unfair. And even then it's iffy.

There is no way to put a pretty face on this blatant power grab by unions and their bought Democratic stooges. If enough workers in a plant, store, jobsite, mine, or whatever can be arm-twisted into signing a card, the union is in.

No democratic election. No secret ballot. No anonymity allowed. You've been arm-twisted, your "vote" has been recorded.

Then the nightmare begins.

The workers and their employer will be forced into a binding arbitration if the employer does not immediately capitulate to the union's demands. Even if this arbitration is so detrimental to the company's business that it results in the demise of the company.

Virginians need to know that Senator Mark Warner has decided that the democratic (small "d") process need not apply to you and your workplace.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · HB1388 And The Meaning Of Words RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

Hello Lloyd. Nice to see you drop in. Guess there's nothing much new to plagiarize lately?

Let me back up a moment.

My previous little clip was a critique of a bill recently passed out of the House of Representatives. A bill co-sponsored by Virginia's boy wonder Tom "Terrific" Perriello, HB1388.

A couple of commenters got their panties in a bunch because they have fallen for the talking points and not read the bill for themselves.

Lloyd Snook, an attorney from Charlottesville, even begins his comment with the snide remark, "Didn't read the bill before blogging about it, I guess..."

Yes, James and Lloyd, I did read the bill. Now perhaps you two should go and do likewise. Stop listening to defences of the bill and actually take the time to see what it really says.

Neither Lloyd nor James offer arguments of any substance, just platitudes and talking points.

They both claim that I'm wrong when I say that the bill bans participants from regularly attending church, or teaching in a church youth group, but the bill is quite clear on this point. I would also like to be clear on one point. I am not a lawyer. Don't even claim to be, like Lloyd does.

Here is the actual text from HB1388 (now S277) as passed by the House;
Emphasis added;
PROHIBITED ACTIVITIES AND INELIGIBLE ORGANIZATIONS.Section 125 (42 U.S.C. 12575) is amended to read as follows: `SEC. 125. PROHIBITED ACTIVITIES AND INELIGIBLE ORGANIZATIONS.

`(a) Prohibited Activities- A participant in an approved national service position under this subtitle may not engage in the following activities:

`(1) Attempting to influence legislation. (No letters to your Congressman, or I suppose, letters to the editor of your local paper.)

`(2) Organizing or engaging in protests, petitions, boycotts, or strikes....

And so it goes until it gets to paragraph 7;
`(7) Engaging in religious instruction, conducting worship services, providing instruction as part of a program that includes mandatory religious instruction or worship, constructing or operating facilities devoted to religious instruction or worship, maintaining facilities primarily or inherently devoted to religious instruction or worship, or engaging in any form of religious proselytization.
Both James and Lloyd claim the above applies to the organization receiving funds, not the participant.

OK.

Besides the fact that the word participant is plainly used in the above quoted section, the bill itself has a section titled "definitions". In that section there is no official definition for "participant", however the word "participant" is used extensively throughout the bill to describe a citizen volunteer "participating" in this endeavor. Organizations receiving funds are typically referred to in this bill as "Organizations" or "Grant Recipients".

So, I suppose if you're tasked with the rather onerous job of defending this mess you must disregard common English language and its generally accepted use in favor of made up stuff which you've been told to say.

A participant is a participant unless he's an organization, then he's a grant recipient. Give me a break, Lloyd. I may not be a lawyer, but I can read the English language.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Tom Perriello's Idea Of Moderate-ism RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

Jonas Clark, one of the Virginia patriots at UCV, tells us of the requirements for Obama's much vaunted "Volunteer Corp". You remember, he spoke of it so many times during his campaign.

Tom spoke of it often as well, but neither had the courage then, or now, to tell the whole truth of the matter.

Jonas does have the courage to speak of it, but not in the glowing terms you've heard before; He quotes the actual text, as it passed in the House, (with Tom Perriello as Virginia's only Represenative co-sponsoring).
(Italics Jonas')
SEC. 1304. PROHIBITED ACTIVITIES AND INELIGIBLE ORGANIZATIONS.
Section 125 (42 U.S.C. 12575) is amended to read as follows:

SEC. 125. PROHIBITED ACTIVITIES AND INELIGIBLE ORGANIZATIONS.
(a) Prohibited Activities-A participant in an approved national service position under this subtitle may not engage in the following activities:

(1) Attempting to influence legislation. (No calling your congressman to tell him/her to vote yes or no)

(2) Organizing or engaging in protests, petitions, boycotts, or strikes. (No grassroots organizing, no parades, no protests, no Grassfire.)

(7) Engaging in religious instruction, conducting worship services, providing instruction as part of a program that includes mandatory religious instruction or worship, constructing or operating facilities devoted to religious instruction or worship, maintaining facilities primarily or inherently devoted to religious instruction or worship, or engaging in any form of religious proselytization.
[LINK]
Jonas doesn't tell us this final bit of news, but if you scroll on down the text of the bill, to section 6104, you find that this "Volunteer" group will eventually become required service. Sort of like the draft. Except in the Army you can at least attend the Church of your choice.

Way to go Tom! That's really standing up for true Virginia values. NOT!
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line 3 column 2101 - Warning: unescaped & or unknown entity "&sid"
line 3 column 2116 - Warning: unescaped & or unknown entity "&refer"
line 3 column 2123 - Warning: unescaped & or unknown entity "&r_n"
line 3 column 2137 - Warning: unescaped & or unknown entity "&item"
line 3 column 2143 - Warning: unescaped & or unknown entity "&sel"
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Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Frederick Kerfuffle Part Deux RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

Just got off the phone, about an hour or so ago, with a member of the SCC.

It was an interesting conversation, as conversations with this individual usually are. This SCC member is understandably concerned with my position, as stated below, on the Jeff Frederick kerfuffle. (Yes, I'm going to continue to call it a kerfuffle. For now.)

I told my friendly neighborhood SCC member that I too was disappointed. This whole episode has been badly handled from the beginning. Not by that particular SCC member, who is known for handling things well, but by just about everyone else involved.

See, the problem is, most everyone who paid real dollars to travel to Richmond last year, and real dollars to stay at that really nice hotel across the street from the convention, and even more real dollars for food and drink while they were there in support of Jeff Frederick came back from that convention well pleased that their guy had won.

Almost immediately they began to hear rumbles and non-specific gripes from their party elders who had supported Lt. Governor Hager. Some had even been pressured by those same party elders to change their mind at the last minute to vote for Hager.

By the time of the Advance, in December, those rumbles had grown to a dull roar. Yet still there were no specific charges against Chairman Frederick. Just complaints from those whose guy had lost many months before.

Now we come to the point, a few weeks ago, where news reports began leaking that the SCC had decided it was time for Jeff to go. He had been asked to resign, had been told that if he didn't he would be removed in April. But still no specific charges were put forth to the people who had elected him. It still looked to those good people as if the party elders, who had been griping incessantly, were about to exercise their muscle. Strongarm style.

Finally someone had the good sense to release the specific charges to the press. Now the people could at least decide if their party elders were exercising muscle or brain. With Chairman Frederick's release of his response to the charges, one by one, it seemed to most that there was much more muscle than brain at work on the SCC.

Still, as I explained to my SCC member, I knew the SCC had more information than I did. They knew more about the actual situation than the grassroots members knew. But they were not forthcoming with it. For fear of "bad press" I was told, on more than one occasion. By more than one "insider".

My God, how much worse could the press get?

Speaking of bad press, the reply, from some un-named SCC member, to John Gizzi that no thought whatsoever had been given to a possible replacement, was enough for me.

But not yet. Not quite. I've maintained an open mind on this episode this far, I'll keep it open a few more hours. My SCC contact will be visiting me in the morning for coffee. He has what he calls the smoking gun. He has permission to show it, let people read it, let them absorb it, but they cannot copy it.

Fair enough. I'll look at it. I'll absorb it. I'll treat my friend to a cup of great Honduras Coffee and we'll talk about it.

You'll be the first to know.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · SCC and Me. Schedule Conflict RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

I know. I know. I promised to provide my opinion of the "smoking gun" that was offered yesterday. Sometimes things just don't work out.

This morning I put on a pot of coffee, and nothing happened. Well, not nothing. Something happened, of course. Just what was supposed to happen didn't. The water never got hot and forced its way up that little tube into the nozzle that sprays out over the freshly ground bean fragments, converting them into a damp, dark brown, muddy looking mass while producing a hot pot of morning. Instead, the cold water just sat there. Slowly leaking out onto the counter, an obvious omen that the day would not go according to plan.

I searched through the garage for my old Mr. Coffee backup, as reliable as it is ugly, and tried again. Of course, it worked.

While performing the monthly de-batcherlorization of my kitchen, I spoke again with my SCC friend. He was going to try to fit me in between two other meetings today, one early this morning, the second at 3:00pm at a location almost 3 hours from here.

It couldn't happen. If he made the one hour detour by my house, he would be almost 2 hours late for his second meeting. Can't have that.

We'll try again in the coming days, and once again, I promise. You'll be the first to know.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Jeff Frederick Kerfuffle* RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

I've stayed out of this until now, but the following quote seals it for me;

"No one yet. We haven’t thought it through that far. Right now, getting Frederick out is the main idea."

Sorry, but if that's the "plan" of the SCC, I just ain't gonna go along with it.

I've read the charges. I've read the responses to those charges by Chairman Frederick. I'm reminded of two modern quotes;
"there's no 'there' there." Gertrude Stein

And

"We have met the enemy and he is us." Walt Kelly, via Pogo
*Kerfuffle; (Noun)1.- a noisy and disorderly incident

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Newspapers: Shall We Play The Requiem Now? RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

By Barnie Day; Another Guest Shot From Meadows of Dan


Not just yet. Let’s at least have a national debate before we bury this one.

The cataclysmic demise is well documented. Going forward, the question is: Is there a model that (1) acknowledges and accommodates the current reality and (2) preserves the critical role of a free and independent press?

There might be—a national newspaper trust that could purchase these faltering papers. (If there is an upside to an 83% devaluation in newspaper stocks in 2008, it is the creation of an incredible buyers' market.)

Sure to God, if such a structure can save swamps, farmland, old buildings, artifacts of importance, odd plant life, long-eared rodents, queer little birds, and a host of other good and worthy considerations, such a thing could be established to preserve an entity that is so very crucial to policy, to government, to Democracy, to our collective well-being, as independent newspapers are.

There is no evidence whatsoever that the industry can save itself. Newspapers are cannibalizing themselves by giving their content to the Internet, and if that’s not bad enough, they’re slashing the only real competitive advantage they have—their reporters, writers and editors. Seems an odd survival strategy, if you ask me.

If newspapers are to survive, then retro, or old school, journalism relieved of profit pressure by trust ownership and subsidy may be the model.

How to fund such a trust? Three ways:

1) A national newspaper lottery would generate significant proceeds. Although 42 states and one or two territories conduct lotteries of some sort, there is no national lottery in the U. S. Lotteries are a form of taxation, but as Jefferson pointed out, the fairest form of taxation in that the burden is laid “only upon the backs of the willing.” This burden would be a worthy one.

2) A voluntary one-dollar check-off contribution on federal income tax returns would raise significant money, too—and give taxpayers a direct voice in how at least some of their money is spent. It wouldn’t be complicated. They could say “yes” or “no” simply by checking or not checking the box. It’s a pity we don’t have more such direct opportunities to say “yes” or “no” with a lot of other spending.

I know the "government" argument. It makes some folks queasy. It does me sometimes, but the granting of tax-exempt status and playing the role of mere pass-through collection/disbursement agent for a lottery and for income tax check-off falls short of "government sponsorship of newspapers."

A national trust would, in fact, come closer to vesting ownership with that teeming miasma otherwise known as "the people"—a good thing, in my opinion—than any other arrangement I presently know of, far closer than family and/or corporate ownership (think Rupert Murdoch) does now.

3) The largest consumer, and beneficiary, of newspapers in the world has to be Google, which means Google, and other search engines, have the most to lose if (when) the newspaper industry collapses. It is an interesting paradox: the primary instrument of newspaper destruction has the most to lose. The implication is that they must dance together.

Google doesn't pay for newspapers' proprietary content, although it does pay the Associated Press under a contract negotiated in 2006.

Let's consider the numbers.

Google performs approximately 235 million searches per day. If ten percent of these searches referenced newspaper print, and if Google agreed to contribute one penny ( 1 cent) for each of these to a national trust, the annual contribution would exceed $85 million. Can Google afford this? Yes. They earned $1.21 BILLION just during the last 90 days of 2008 alone. (I won’t even point out that Google could write such a contribution off as a tax deduction.)

Why propose this? What does it matter? That's the easy one. It is in our national interest that newspapers survive.

Barnie Day is a banker in Stuart, Virginia

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · How To Outspend History In One Short Lesson RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

Somewhere today I read that Senator McConnell (R-Ky.) has come up with a novel way to explain just how much President Obama and the Democratic Congress has spent in the first 50 days of this administration. His math was pretty straight-forward, coming to roughly 1 billion, (with a "b"), dollars per day.

1,000,000,000.00 Dollars. Every day. For 50 days. Less than two Months.

But that number is still out of reach for most of us to understand.

Let me see if I can bring it into a more readily digested form. Let's suppose, for a moment, that you were there in Bethlehem a little over 2000 years ago when Christ was born.

Now let's suppose that your way to celebrate this great occasion was to begin handing out 20 dollar bills. There were no cigars to hand out at that time, so a paper portrait of Andy Jackson will have to do. (Never mind that there were no 20 dollar bills 2000 years ago either. We're supposin', remember?)

When you're standing on a corner handing out 20 dollar bills, word gets out pretty quick. A line forms. Soon you are handing out 20 dollar bills at a rapid clip --about one per second-- $1200 bucks per hour. I know some lawyers, a few bankers, a preacher or two, and some doctors, but I don't know anyone who makes $1200 bucks an hour.

Anyway. You stand there. Handing out your 20 dollar bills as fast as you can. People file past and collect their 20 bucks and shuffle on their way. You continue to do this until you've spent your own 1.2 trillion dollars. (I know, you don't have 1.2 trillion dollars. Obama and Congress don't either, but that didn't stop them. Did it?)

You finally exhaust your pile of Jacksons about the time that Obama is elected.

Over two thousand years. At 20 bucks per second. Twelve hundred bucks an hour. I know some lawyers, a few bankers, a preacher or two, and some doctors, but I still don't know anyone who makes $1200 bucks an hour. But I know of some folks who can spend it way faster than that.

NOTE:
This exercise, by necessity, is an estimate only. For the first 1500 years or so you will run out of people in the world before you run out of seconds in the year.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Guest Author Barnie Day; Spring Post RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

Boss Bird Is Back In Town

By Barnie Day

HEADWATERS OF THE DAN—The kingfisher kept his word and came back yesterday. He left out in mid-October—probably to South America. I don’t know for sure. He keeps his secrets, too.

I was on our back patio, watching the sun come streaking and flaring over the mountains, and he announced his return from his favorite perch, a maple limb that hangs out over our pond. He is an exuberant, raucous male in his flashy prime.

This is his sixth trip back. I don’t know that he’s the same bird, but he says he is. He doesn’t strike me as a liar.

He is always first, always early. There are still slips of snow in fence corners and along the line of trees that flank our driveway. The willow tree is barely budding. The frogs still sleep.

Other water birds come and show proprietary interest—ducks, herons, cranes, plovers, pipers, egrets. Big geese glide in, flaps down, honking loud enough to
wake the dead, and slalom the water as if wearing skis.

In mid-summer, an osprey, heavy enough to sway the pine boughs back and forth, will come to fish—and bicker back and forth with the shrieking crows, and other water dwellers—beavers and muskrats, lizards and water snakes, booming, bellowing bullfrogs—will show themselves—but the kingfisher gets dibs on this pond. He always does.

The Dan is birthed from a clear, cold fissure spring in a swampy place half a mile distant, ponding on my neighbor’s place, then on ours. From here, it meanders back and forth across the Virginia-North Carolina border for maybe a hundred and fifty miles until it joins the Roanoke River and disappears into
Kerr Lake Reservoir, a 50,000-acre Corps of Engineers flood control and hydroelectric impoundment built in the 1950s—a place better known as Bugg’s Island.

This bird is mouthy. He screeches and clacks. He fluffs himself. He buffs his beak against the maple limb. Boss bird is back in town.

I know his exuberance—to splash your face in a spring that is a river’s origin gives rise to such—but I know, too, that he doesn’t preen and brag for me.

A mate is somewhere near. I haven’t seen her yet, but I know that she is here. No doubt, he is promising her the moon. She will settle for something less—a
tunnel dug into the bank across the pond from where I stand, a six-to-eight foot tunnel, and at the end of it, a cubbyhole nesting room.

No, they won’t peck it out—they will dig—more a dance—it with their feet. They bring tiny shovels. The middle toes on each of their feet grow together and
make small scoops just for this. They will raise a small brood of chicks on insects, small fish, and other aquatic life.

In all, there are maybe ninety species of kingfishers spread across three families—Alcedinidae (river), Halcyonidae (tree), and Cerylidae (water) and scattered in woodland and water habitats throughout the world.

This is a Belted Kingfisher, the most common in North America—and here in Meadows of Dan—if you can call such an exquisite creature “common.”

(Photo Credit / Wikipedia)

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · First Patrick, Now It's Augusta County... RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

Back in January there was quite a dust-up in neighboring Patrick County regarding the new property tax assessments. Everyone thought the new values were unfair, but most importantly, everyone was terribly upset over the impact this had on their tax bill. It's long past time for Virginians to learn just what the relationship really is between their property assessment and their tax bill. I am re-publishing my January article, with Augusta County now standing in the role of aggrieved county.

H/T to SWAC Girl and Yankee Phillip

Augusta Patrick County citizens are up in arms over their latest property assessments. Well, to be a bit more accurate, they are upset over their latest property tax bill. This time of year that is a fairly common complaint all across Virginia. This year it's Augusta Patrick County, next year it may be Henrico. Or perhaps Suffolk. Or any of Virginia's other counties. What the good people of Augusta Patrick County do not know, and I'll wager most Virginians do not know either, is that their new re-assessment did not cause their property tax bill to shoot through the roof.

Yes, I meant what I wrote. Your increased assessment did not cause your property tax to increase. Your Board of Supervisors caused that increase.

The Code of Virginia, (that great big book with all of Virginia's many laws listed in an orderly manner), makes it clear. Any new assessment that causes a tax bill increase of more than 1% requires, yes, requires, a reduction in the tax rate. A rate reduction that will bring all tax bills back into that 1% range.

What the Code of Virginia does not require is that the new tax remain at the reduced rate. Read that again. The new tax does not have to remain at it's legally required lower rate.

My neighbors in Augusta Patrick County; Your tax rate went up, not because of your new assessment, but because your Board of Supervisors cannot control their spending.

I'm sure if you go back and look at the minutes of your Board of Supervisors meetings you will find the quick, quiet, probably unanimous vote to roll back your tax rate. A roll back that brought your tax bill within the legal 1% increase range.

Further searches through those minutes will reveal a vote, equally quick and quiet, unanimous or not, that immediately raised that rate to where it is now.

These two votes could have even occurred during the same meeting. They may have even been concurrent votes. Or even a vote on a single motion to both lower and raise the rate. All the law requires is that the rate be lowered.

Oh, to be sure, there is a requirement that all this be explained on your tax bill. And I'll bet it is. But is it explained in a manner that you can follow and understand? Not likely. Otherwise you guys would not be so upset about your assessment. Or nearly so mad at your idiot assessor.

As a former Delegate, Barnie Day, recently stated in an Op-Ed in the Martinsville Bulletin;
Most of the rage, consternation and anguish brought about by the recent real property reassessments is misdirected.

The state does not establish the value of our real estate. The county does not — nor does the town council, the farm bureau, the Boy Scouts, etc.

Simply put, the marketplace sets this value — the marketplace and nothing else. It is a hypothetical expression of what a willing buyer would likely give a willing seller, as determined by the best evidence available — comparable sales, best estimates and so on.
The guy who assessed your property most likely got it right. Or at least very close. He or she has no reason to do otherwise, and many reasons not to get it wrong. As licensed, regulated professionals their work is based upon the marketplace, experience, research, and again, the marketplace.

I suggest you ask your Supervisor about this. Ask him why the board can't restrain its spending. Ask him why the explanation is not more clearly explained on your bill.

Just don't go on blaming the wrong guy. Your assessor didn't do it.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · John Brownlee, My Choice For Virginia's Next Attorney General RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

In 2001-2002 John Brownlee, at the time U.S. Attorney for the Western District of Virginia, prosecuted my Board of Supervisors member from Buchanan County. Yes, my BOS member. The one I voted for. The one I worked to get elected.

But that's OK. He deserved it. He had violated not only the law, but the trust of the people of north-western Buchanan County. He was convicted and, I think, is still serving his time.

In 2005 I moved back to my original home County of Henry. John Brownlee, then still U.S. Attorney for the Western District of Virginia, prosecuted my Sheriff. No, I didn't have an opportunity to vote for, or work for, that Sheriff. But I would have if I had lived here during his campaign.

But that's OK. He deserved it. He had violated not only the law, but the trust of the people of Henry County. He was convicted and has since served his time.

Even after that history, or more accurately, perhaps, because of it, I am proud to be a 9th District delegate to the Republican Convention for John Brownlee for Attorney General.

John Brownlee has proven his commitment to the Rule of Law. His entire life has been committed to the preservation of our American way of life, our freedom, and our honor.

In my classroom I teach my students to stand for truth and do what is right, I expect my government to do the same. I know from experience that John Brownlee will take that same commitment to the Attorney General's office.

Our country needs the direction and forethought of experienced and caring public servants who have been tested and proven. Our Commonwealth needs the trust and experience of a dedicated, and yes, tested and proven, prosecuting attorney to protect the heritage and the future of that Commonwealth. As Republicans, we are truly blessed to have three very good candidates working to gain the nomination for Attorney General. One stands out in that group. As Virginians, we will be equally blessed to have as Attorney General former U.S. Attorney John Brownlee.

A former Army Ranger, John Brownlee has long been dedicated to supporting and defending our country. As U.S. Attorney, John worked tirelessly to defend and protect Virginian values. As the only Veteran, as well as the only prosecuting attorney running for Attorney General, Virginia cannot afford to make any other choice. John Brownlee has my enthusiastic support and I encourage all delegates to the Virginia Republican Convention to cast their vote for John Brownlee.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Is Timmy! A Liar? Is Jody A Liar? Someone's Pants On Fire! RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

Back on November 12, right here in SWVA, WDBJ 7 reported that Governor Tim Kaine simply would not take a cabinet appointment from then President-elect Barack Obama. He was adamant that Virginia's Republican Lt. Governor was not even a part of the decision. Kaine was quoted;
It’s not turning the keys over to Bill Bolling that worries me. It’s that I took an oath to be here for my whole term, and that’s what I’ve done, and I’ve actually communicated that to the President-elect already. We had talked about it a number of weeks back, but we’ve communicated since the election and I’ve made that plain.[LINK]
Now we have Democrat Lt. Governor candidate Jody Wagner claiming that Timmy! just didn't mean that. She knows his heart, apparently. Ms. Wagner says;
If we had a Lt. Governor today that was a Democrat, Governor Kaine would have taken a position in the Obama administration...
Thanks to my friend Jim Riley for bringing this to our attention. Jim has a few questions for Ms. Wagner and Gov. Timmy! at Virginia Virtucon. He also has this video, after watching it I suppose many of us will have questions for both Wagner and Kaine;
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Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · It's Endorsement Time In Old Virginia RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

I have two serious addictions. Coffee. And a smoke.

After a day of wrangling 11th and 12th grade students, and answering 25 dozen - at least - questions, some inane, a precious few thoughtful and on subject, that is all I long for.

Most afternoons, around 3:15, I can be found caressing a cup of hot coffee and fingering a smoldering cigarette at the cafe closest to my school.

Yesterday was such a day. In the midst of my reverie, my cell phone rang. A quick glance at the screen showed an 804 area code and an unfamiliar number. I answered.

"Hello."

"Alton? This is Matt Wells, with the Bill Bolling for Lt. Governor campaign."

"Hi Matt, how you doing?"

"Oh, I can't complain."

"Come on, Matt. Remember, I know you. I've heard you complain. You do it quite well."

"OK, you got me. But what I really want to know is, can I add your name to a list of 9th District supporters of Bill for Lt. Governor?" (Side note: I've recently moved two miles away, into the 9th Congressional District, and the 16th Legislative District. So long Perriello. So long Ward.)

"Of course Matt. Enthusiastically. Emphatically. Any other superlatives you want to use are fine with me. I love alliteration, please pick one or two that start with 'E'."

"Sure. How about Energetically?"

"You don't really know me, do you Matt?"

Or at least that's a rough paraphrasing of the conversation I had with Matthew on Thursday afternoon.

I do enthusiastically, emphatically, and yes, even energetically endorse Bill Bolling in his quest for the Republican nomination to be our Lt. Governor candidate. My regular readers know my affinity for coal and coalfield people. Coalfield Bill has my complete support.

Previously I've officially endorsed Don Merricks, coming soon will be my endorsements of what I hope to be the final Republican slate in my area; Bob McDonnell for Governor, John Brownlee for Attorney General, Danny Marshall in the 14th House District, Charles Poindexter in the 9th House District, a currently un-named candidate from Carroll County who will hopefully become our standard bearer in the 10th House District, and Bill Carrico in the neighboring House District to our West.
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Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Thought For The Day RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

Politicians don't make economic decisions, they make political decisions that have economic consequences.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Ward Armstrong WILL DEFINITELY be opposed.... RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

The only question remaining is which opponent will it be...

Earlier I mentioned a possible candidate who is garnering quite a bit of support here in Henry County from the business community. That candidate is not quite ready to announce officially yet.

Now I hear of another fine candidate from Patrick County who is also developing a following. This candidate, too, is reluctant to officially announce.

I don't know yet when the 10th Legislative District Committee will meet and decide on a method of nomination - Mass Meeting, Convention, or Primary, - though the information I have points toward a likely Mass Meeting. Neither candidate is aware of a specific date or method either. That information is being closely guarded by the few GOP insiders who make such decisions.

I suppose both are waiting for some certainty in the nomination method before making an official announcement.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · An Inconsequential Story RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

The ownership of a blog is not as simple as some would think.

Sure, most bloggers simply regurgitate various news items, as though their readership would never find them through the real media. That's pretty simple. Other bloggers dig deep into some real investigative journalism, but they are rare indeed.

Still others, such as this one, simply provide what is hoped to be thoughtful commentary on a wide array of subjects. Sounds simple, but just which subjects should one cover?

In my case, a subject must mean something to me. Personally. I really don't write this stuff for my readers, though I do appreciate each and every one of you, I write it only for myself.

Through some tools available to all bloggers I know who my readers are. Most of you anyway. I know that many in the Virginia General Assembly, and members of their staff, are regular readers. I have several readers inside the beltway, presumably involved with the Federal Government in some way. I only hope that in some small way I can enlighten and entertain you.

At any given time I have a half-dozen or so article ideas floating around, and typically just as many pieces in draft form. Most never make it to the publish stage. You see, that's the really hard part of maintaining/writing/publishing a blog. Just what does get past the gate and onto the web page?

Right now, for example, I have a couple of stories that I could tell. Stories that may or may not mean anything to you, my reader. It all depends upon who you know, how you know them, and even where you are. A local story could mean nothing to a local reader, yet mean a lot to someone in Richmond, or Washington, if a character in the story is recognized.

Yes, there is a lot to think about before publishing what most readers would see as an inconsequential story. Such as this one.

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Rube Goldberg, Phone Home RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

By Barnie Day;

Want to experience the audio equivalent of deer-in-the-headlights? Call your senator, your congressman, your governor, your delegate, your state senator, your commissioner, your member of city or town council, or your mayor and ask how the $1 trillion "stimulus" package coming out of Washington sometime around mid-February is going to work, what form it will take, who gets the money, how the dough will be disbursed.

This is not chicken feed we’re talking about. Or is it?

Remember the $600 "stimulus" ($1200 for couples) the government put on your credit card and gave to you in 2007? That was chicken feed.

How ’bout the "stimulus" package of 2008, the one that insisted that things would be alright if banks that got into trouble making bad loans simply made more of them? Remember? That was chicken feed.

How ’bout the Detroit bailouts? You know–that one– where we pay the car makers to re-tool so they can build more cars that people don’t want to buy. Chicken feed.

Virginia’s $3 billion deficit? Pfft! Shoo! Go Away! We’ve got a trillion dollar issue to sort out!

Don’t bother asking if any of this makes sense. We’re way beyond that. We’re in the netherworld, that mind-place that says you can borrow yourself out of debt, that dark warm place some people jam their heads into and shout in a thousand muffled voices, "A trillion dollar deficit is horrible so let’s double it!" (Assuming China will loan us another trillion.)

And don’t bother dragging the economists into it. They’ve all succumbed to lemming-think. Let them sleep.

So what to do? How shall we sort it out? How shall we understand what’s coming?

Herewith, three approaches:

1. Do the math. If it’s a trillion dollars, and 40 per cent goes to tax cuts, that leaves $600 billion in direct government spending-healthcare, bridges, whatever. It won’t be distributed fairly (in politics, the fair leaves in October), but let’s imagine, for the moment, that it will be– say on a per capita basis. That works out to about $1714.29 for each of us, or here in Patrick County $32.5 million–about enough to build another two miles of U.S. 58 up Lover’s Leap Mountain.

2. Go for the audio equivalent of the deer-in-the-headlights, mentioned above.

3. Ask your cat. At least mine had the decency to offer a throaty "meow." (I cheated, though. I was holding a carton of milk when I asked him.) Untitled
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Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Your Assessor Didn't Do It. Your BOS Did. RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

Patrick County citizens are up in arms over their latest property assessments. Well, to be a bit more accurate, they are upset over their latest property tax bill. This time of year that is a fairly common complaint all across Virginia. This year it's Patrick County, next year it may be Henrico. Or perhaps Suffolk. Or any of Virginia's other counties. What the good people of Patrick County do not know, and I'll wager most Virginians do not know either, is that their new re-assessment did not cause their property tax bill to shoot through the roof.

Yes, I meant what I wrote. Your increased assessment did not cause your property tax to increase. Your Board of Supervisors caused that increase.

The Code of Virginia, (that great big book with all of Virginia's many laws listed in an orderly manner), makes it clear. Any new assessment that causes a tax bill increase of more than 1% requires, yes, requires, a reduction in the tax rate. A rate reduction that will bring all tax bills back into that 1% range.

What the Code of Virginia does not require is that the new tax remain at the reduced rate. Read that again. The new tax does not have to remain at it's legally required lower rate.

My neighbors in Patrick County; Your tax rate went up, not because of your new assessment, but because your Board of Supervisors cannot control their spending.

I'm sure if you go back and look at the minutes of your Board of Supervisors meetings you will find the quick, quiet, probably unanimous vote to roll back your tax rate. A roll back that brought your tax bill within the legal 1% increase range.

Further searches through those minutes will reveal a vote, equally quick and quiet, unanimous or not, that immediately raised that rate to where it is now.

These two votes could have even occurred during the same meeting. They may have even been concurrent votes. Or even a vote on a single motion to both lower and raise the rate. All the law requires is that the rate be lowered.

Oh, to be sure, there is a requirement that all this be explained on your tax bill. And I'll bet it is. But is it explained in a manner that you can follow and understand? Not likely. Otherwise you guys would not be so upset about your assessment. Or nearly so mad at your idiot assessor.

As your former Delegate, Barnie Day recently stated in an Op-Ed in the Martinsville Bulletin;
Most of the rage, consternation and anguish brought about by the recent real property reassessment in Patrick County is misdirected.

The state does not establish the value of our real estate. The county does not — nor does the town council, the farm bureau, the Boy Scouts, etc.

Simply put, the marketplace sets this value — the marketplace and nothing else. It is a hypothetical expression of what a willing buyer would likely give a willing seller, as determined by the best evidence available — comparable sales, best estimates and so on.
The guy who assessed your property most likely got it right. Or at least very close. He or she has no reason to do otherwise, and many reasons not to get it wrong. As licensed, regulated professionals their work is based upon the marketplace, experience, research, and again, the marketplace.

I suggest you ask your Supervisor about this. Ask him why the board can't restrain its spending. Ask him why the explanation is not more clearly explained on your bill.

Just don't go on blaming the wrong guy. Your assessor didn't do it. Untitled
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Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Henry County Is Becoming A Blogging Hotbed RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

For its population, Henry County is now, suddenly, probably more blogful than any other Virginia county.

For way too long I was here all by myself. Then badrose came on board. Next came Billy Jack, (come on back Billy), and then we got a Lowell Feld imitator in James White.

We now have two new Democratic blogs here in Henry County. Both of these new Democratic blogs are respectful, thoughtful, idealistic, progressive blogs. I enthusiastically ask my readers to go over and check out 220South and Dem-Bones.

I encourage both 220 South and Dem bones to continue and welcome them to the Virginia blog community.

Five bloggers in one low population county? Who can top that? Untitled
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Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · It's Mine, Dammit! I've Had It For Years, And I Ain't Gonna Give It Up! RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

No, that headline does not reflect an actual quote. Not by me nor anyone else I know.

Instead, it reflects a general feeling that seems to be affecting way too many GOP Unit leaders in Virginia, (and perhaps nationwide).

Recently my friend Shaun Kenney laid forth an open letter to the RPV (Republican Party of Virginia), and he hit on many a problem (or potential problem). I endorse most of the thoughts he expressed in that letter. (Letter available here in PDF form alternately, it is also available here, and here as a Word document.)

In this document, Kenney suggests that change should begin at the bottom, and work up to the statewide group, RPV. I agree.
Experimentally, unit committees should consider reorganizing along the following lines and principles:

  • All unit committees must radically commit themselves to new media. That means a community blog focusing on issues pertinent to the locality in which they live, open to all the members of the committee (Democrats tend to use SoapBlox as their platform of choice; Drupal, Joomla, or even WordPress is suitable).
  • Chairman is elected as the lead community organizer. As a first among equals, the chairman co-ordinates as a garden-variety chairman would.
  • All districts and precincts are given a chairman. These individuals form the Executive Committee of any given unit committee, and targets the specific race (supervisor, city council, school board) under their jurisdiction.
  • The idea of "district and precinct chairman" should be expanded to advocacy groups as well. This means anything from minority outreach1 to youth advocacy, from Republican Womens’ units to Young Republicans, all the way down to Republican Liberty Caucus organizations or Taxpayer Alliances within a locality. Every group with a "tribe" should have a seat at the table.
  • The Executive Committee subsumes the role of Finance, Communications, and all grassroots activity. No vice chairs for finance, communications, membership, or any of the nominal. The Napoleonic dictum "Every soldier carries a marshal's baton in his pack" is the rule.
  • A strong focus on driving a narrative both within the online community and in the traditional media should be imperative. Perception is reality; MSM outlets are typically hesitant to challenge a strong new media culture. Moreover, strong alternative outlets for information attached to the unit committee are essential.
  • Surrender the message control. This is probably the most difficult thing for unit committees to learn, but increasing participation means a decrease in message control. Jefferson’s advice still rings true. "We are not afraid to follow truth wherever it may lead, nor to tolerate any error so long as reason is left free to combat it" is wonderfully appropriate advice. After all, are we the party of free minds, free markets, and a free society – or are we not? It is far better to be bold (fortuna audaces juvat?) than it is to remain safe… and losing.

What is being advocated at the local level is a bold, spirited return to the principles of direct action and the entrepreneurial spirit of the Republican Party, and a direction away from the top heavy role imposed by an outmoded system of unit organization.
What exactly is Shaun saying here? My best interpretation is given in the headline above. Too many Units are "led" by people who have held their position for way too long. Long enough that they have developed a feeling of ownership of their Unit. Held so long they just "know" that no one else could possibly be more concerned for the good of the Party than they are.

Unfortunately, far too often, that leads to situations such as experienced last year by Tazewell County. And Augusta County, and Fluvanna County. And who knows how many that were never challenged or publicized.

Such tactics lead others in the community, others who could be strong workers for the GOP and conservative causes, to avoid the local Unit as though it were infected with a virus. When such attitudes begin to show, it could be said that Unit really has become infected with a virus. We are what people perceive us to be, I suppose. We need to work together, as individuals, as small groups, and as what Shaun describes as "tribes" in order to grow our Units.

Far too often the growth of the Unit is feared instead of encouraged. Too many people participating in a Mass Meeting means harder work getting re-elected Chairman, that cannot be tolerated.

Horse hockey! It must be tolerated. It must be encouraged. It must be worked for.

Thankfully, there will not be any change in the Henry County local Unit's Chairmanship during this critical election cycle. Perhaps that will allow Units such as ours to function as designed without any "looking over my shoulder" antics by our leaders.

In the meantime, I suggest Shaun's letter be required reading for all Unit Chairmen and other local leaders. Untitled
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Im Not Emeril · In The 16th HOD, Don Merricks RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

In the 16th House of Delegates District, so far it appears Don Merricks will be unopposed in 2009. The House leadership fumbled badly in 2007 when they put up a locally despised failed soap opera actor to run against Don Merricks. Don was something of an unknown at the time, but he came with impeccable credentials.

A business leader in Pittsylvania County, Don was persuaded to run by Senator Robert Hurt and former Senator Charles Hawkins. With support like that what else could Don do but win? He did. In an overwhelming manner.

Don himself could hardly be described as overwhelming. A true southern gentleman and unashamed Christian, Don is one of the finest people I know.

His first year in the General Assembly however, could be described as overwhelming. During a freshman year, a year in which most new Delegates simply learn their way from the best local parking spots to the GA building and where best to find coffee, Don was a factor from the beginning. He had a phenomenal freshman year, and I expect the upcoming session will showcase Don's easy personality and honest hard work just as well as his first.

Even if the Democrats do find someone to oppose Don, he still will have my wholehearted endorsement.

Next...
House of Delegates District 14. Untitled
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Im Not Emeril · Ward Armtrong Challenger About To Step Up? RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

I mentioned in an earlier piece that there are at least three potential candidates interested in taking on Ward Armstrong in 2009. I've personally spoken with two of them, and neither one is ready to commit at this point. Actually, neither one has come to any final decision on whether they even want to run yet.

Now I get an email that may persuade one of the three to come to a final decision. There is a group of local leaders, led by... Never mind, the leader of the group has asked that I not reveal his name, not yet.

According to this email, and a follow-up phone call, there is a planned breakfast meeting scheduled in the coming weeks. During that breakfast meeting, (which I have learned will be at Ryan's Steak House in Martinsville), one of the three candidates will be asked to campaign against Ward.

I've also called the potential candidate named in the email. His response was one of surprise. "I'm pleased that guys like [redacted] would think enough of me to want me to run, but I have no plans right now to do so," he said. "Like you Alton, I've heard the rumors too. I know my name has been mentioned at times in rumors and innuendo about this, but that's all it is right now, rumor."

When I asked him if he would consider their request, if offered, he replied, "It's too early for me to say, I haven't even been invited to the breakfast you mentioned. But if that situation arises, I'll seriously consider their request."

More to come... Untitled
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Im Not Emeril · What You Are About To See Is Unrehearsed And Uncensored. RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

Fascinating link I ran across this morning. In the late 1950s Mike Wallace hosted a show, sponsored by Phillip Morris, called "The Mike Wallace Interview". No, I'm not old enough to actually remember it. I was only two years old, besides, I don't think we even owned a TV in 1957.
"Whether you agree or disagree with what you will hear, we feel that none will deny the right of these views to be broadcast."
Given complete freedom by both the network and his sponsor, Mr. Wallace interviewed America's most influential, infuriating, introspective, and even incompetent newsmakers of the time.

From Gloria Swanson to Commando Kelly. From Steve Allen to Orval Faubus. From Eddie Arcaro to Margaret Sanger. It's an impressive list. And some amazing, uncensored interviews.

Mike Wallace donated those interviews, and the films, to the Harry Ransom Center at the University of Texas at Austin where the old kinescopes, (16mm films taken of video monitors), were digitized and transcripted. Of Course Mr. Wallace maintained his copyright, or I would love to drop the interview of Dr. Henry Wriston into this page. On August 17, 1958 Dr. Wriston spoke on a variety of subjects, including the Middle East Crisis. Yes, Virginia, there has been a "Middle East Crisis" more or less continuously my entire lifetime. And for many years before that.
WALLACE: Well, we'll get to the foreign service, if we may, a little bit later in the program, but right now I'd like to stay in the Middle East, if I may. Talking about the Middle East, and I think you'll agree that it's a troubled spot .. now as well as back in the days of the Saracens..

WRISTON: And will be, for another fifty years.
There are many other interviews. Some light and fun, some very heavy and thoughtful. Many that will enlighten my younger readers and bring remembrances to those of my generation. I encourage you to go browse through the offerings at The Mike Wallace Interview Collection. Untitled
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Im Not Emeril · Auld Lang Syne. 2009 Endorsements RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

It's time to put 2008 to bed and begin thinking about 2009. Thinking politically. Thinking Virginia. Virginia is unique in that there is an election of one sort or another every year. There's always someone running for something here in Virginia.

Here in Henry County we will have a full slate of statewide races this year. In the House of Delegates, districts 10, 14, and 16 are all on the line. Nearby we have House of Delegates district 9 in Franklin County. A little further away, but still close to our HOD districts, we have districts 5, 8, and 6.

Needless to say, all but the 10th HOD district incumbents have earned my endorsement. Danny Marshall and Don Merricks here in Henry County have my enthusiastic support. I also fully support our neighbors Charles Poindexter, Bill Carrico, Annie B. Crockett-Stark, and Morgan Griffith.

Ward Armstrong, in the 10th District, warrants a closer look. Ward and I went to school together, though I doubt he remembers it. He was the same spoilt brat then that he seems to be now in the HOD.

That sense of entitlement that you perceive when speaking to Ward? That feeling of superiority that you feel he harbors? They have been there for years. Sure, Ward really is an intelligent guy. He's probably more intelligent than you. You instinctively know it. He knows it. And he doesn't mind knowing that you know it. And he doesn't mind that he knows that you know it. In fact, he thrives on knowing that you know it. The only thing that could ever possibly bother him is thinking that you don't know it.

Ward openly considers himself the reincarnation of his political mentor, A.L. Philpott. Ward's greatest ambition is to be Speaker of the House. He cares little about Henry, Patrick, or Carroll County. In fact, he's been heard to openly disparage the good folks out in Carroll.

What Ward depends upon is his constituents short memory and certain habitual voters diminished mental capacity to remember that A.L. was a really conservative Democrat. I mean REALLY conservative. More conservative than the most reviled "right wing extremist" is now perceived to be. Albert L. supported the closing of entire school districts in order to maintain segregation. Albert L. supported most, if not all of the DixieCrat platform that denied the legitimacy of the Rev. Martin Luther King. Albert L. even loved himself a good cockfight, Roscoe.

Come on, Henry, Patrick, Floyd and Carroll County. This is perhaps Virginia's most conservative area. But we are not the conservatives once represented by A.L. Philpott and his ilk. Philpott did have his endearing qualities. He was important in a Virginia History kind of way. He was important for Henry County and Martinsville in many ways. He was a faithful supporter of our local industries and lifestyle. But he was no more a present day Democrat than I am. Why do we continue to vote for those that claim him as their legacy, yet are so far removed from his record and ideology? Why do we continue to vote for our homegrown pair of losers? Ward and Roscoe must go! We vote for his legacies simply because we do not know better. It's time we learned better.

Ward is dependent upon these "habitual voters". Those who go into the voting booth and see that familiar name, "Ward Armstrong", and habitually hit the lever. Or "enter" key, or whatever new technology they come up with next.

Enough for now about Ward. I'll be introducing his opponent, (there are three currently rumored to be considering), whenever one announces.

In the following days I'll be announcing my endorsements for the 2009 election cycle.

Of course I support our incumbents in the 5th, 6th, 8th, 9th, 14th, and 16th HOD districts.

Bill, Annie B., Morgan, Charles, Danny, and Don will represent our conservative principles with vigor in each and every legislative session.

I'll be going into more detail on each in the following days, along with individual articles on each of our statewide races. Untitled
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Im Not Emeril · /2008/12/its-now-been-over-three-years-since-i.html RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

It's now been over three years since I began this foray into blogging and I've enjoyed every minute. Last year about this time I created a little video that I hope brought a smile or two. I present it again in the hope that you will enjoy it once again.



Again, I present the words of Luke, as he describes the reason for our annual celebration.

Luke 2

1 And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be taxed.

2 (And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.)

3 And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city.

4 And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:)

5 To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child.

6 And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered.

7 And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.

8 And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.

9 And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.

10 And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.

11 For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.

12 And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.

13 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying,

14 Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.

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Im Not Emeril · Blogrolling Is Pretty Much Dead RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

For more than two years now the membership of the ODBA has enjoyed a centrally updated blogroll on their individual sites. It was easy, a single line of code in your template and your ODBA blogroll was always up to date. It even notified our readers when a new post was published by our members, when that feature actually worked, which it seldom did.

I'm a patient guy, so when Blogrolling went belly-up a few months ago I was not too disturbed. I'm through being patient.

I'll no longer click on the blogrolling.com site just to read the same lame explanations for their deadness. I'm now recommending all ODBA members use the following widget in place of the ODBA blogroll. Your blogrolling.com JavaScript still works, it just will no longer be updated when a new blog such as CrystalClearConservative comes on board.

When I created the ODBA widget I also created one for our friends at the Jeffersoniad. I hope you guys will use and enjoy it.
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Im Not Emeril · The Christmas Carnival Comes Again RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

Each year bloggers get together in the spirit of the season and submit a number of entries to a round-up of links called a carnival.

It's really tough work sorting through the entries, deciding which goes where, which belong together, and which should be highlighted, then writing a short introduction for each link. Who does it better than Kat? No one.

Mash your mouse here to get a Christmas Eve's worth of Christmas Spirit.

Thanks Kat, for all you do. Untitled
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Im Not Emeril · Christmas Eve Reading RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

Many families have a tradition of reading aloud a Christmas themed story or selection from the Bible on Christmas Eve. In an earlier piece below I've included the Christmas Story as told by Luke in the New Testament. Before you read that story to your family this evening let me suggest you set the mood with this classic O. Henry short story.

THE GIFT OF THE MAGI
by O. Henry
One dollar and eighty-seven cents. That was all. And sixty cents of it was in pennies. Pennies saved one and two at a time by bulldozing the grocer and the vegetable man and the butcher until one's cheeks burned with the silent imputation of parsimony that such close dealing implied. Three times Della counted it. One dollar and eighty- seven cents. And the next day would be Christmas.

There was clearly nothing to do but flop down on the shabby little couch and howl. So Della did it. Which instigates the moral reflection that life is made up of sobs, sniffles, and smiles, with sniffles predominating.

While the mistress of the home is gradually subsiding from the first stage to the second, take a look at the home. A furnished flat at $8 per week. It did not exactly beggar description, but it certainly had that word on the lookout for the mendicancy squad.

In the vestibule below was a letter-box into which no letter would go, and an electric button from which no mortal finger could coax a ring. Also appertaining thereunto was a card bearing the name "Mr. James Dillingham Young."

The "Dillingham" had been flung to the breeze during a former period of prosperity when its possessor was being paid $30 per week. Now, when the income was shrunk to $20, though, they were thinking seriously of contracting to a modest and unassuming D. But whenever Mr. James Dillingham Young came home and reached his flat above he was called "Jim" and greatly hugged by Mrs. James Dillingham Young, already introduced to you as Della. Which is all very good.

Della finished her cry and attended to her cheeks with the powder rag. She stood by the window and looked out dully at a gray cat walking a gray fence in a gray backyard. Tomorrow would be Christmas Day, and she had only $1.87 with which to buy Jim a present. She had been saving every penny she could for months, with this result. Twenty dollars a week doesn't go far. Expenses had been greater than she had calculated. They always are. Only $1.87 to buy a present for Jim. Her Jim. Many a happy hour she had spent planning for something nice for him. Something fine and rare and sterling--something just a little bit near to being worthy of the honor of being owned by Jim.

There was a pier-glass between the windows of the room. Perhaps you have seen a pier-glass in an $8 flat. A very thin and very agile person may, by observing his reflection in a rapid sequence of longitudinal strips, obtain a fairly accurate conception of his looks. Della, being slender, had mastered the art.

Suddenly she whirled from the window and stood before the glass. her eyes were shining brilliantly, but her face had lost its color within twenty seconds. Rapidly she pulled down her hair and let it fall to its full length.

Now, there were two possessions of the James Dillingham Youngs in which they both took a mighty pride. One was Jim's gold watch that had been his father's and his grandfather's. The other was Della's hair. Had the queen of Sheba lived in the flat across the airshaft, Della would have let her hair hang out the window some day to dry just to depreciate Her Majesty's jewels and gifts. Had King Solomon been the janitor, with all his treasures piled up in the basement, Jim would have pulled out his watch every time he passed, just to see him pluck at his beard from envy.

So now Della's beautiful hair fell about her rippling and shining like a cascade of brown waters. It reached below her knee and made itself almost a garment for her. And then she did it up again nervously and quickly. Once she faltered for a minute and stood still while a tear or two splashed on the worn red carpet.

On went her old brown jacket; on went her old brown hat. With a whirl of skirts and with the brilliant sparkle still in her eyes, she fluttered out the door and down the stairs to the street.

Where she stopped the sign read: "Mne. Sofronie. Hair Goods of All Kinds." One flight up Della ran, and collected herself, panting. Madame, large, too white, chilly, hardly looked the "Sofronie."

"Will you buy my hair?" asked Della.

"I buy hair," said Madame. "Take yer hat off and let's have a sight at the looks of it."

Down rippled the brown cascade.

"Twenty dollars," said Madame, lifting the mass with a practised hand.

"Give it to me quick," said Della.

Oh, and the next two hours tripped by on rosy wings. Forget the hashed metaphor. She was ransacking the stores for Jim's present.

She found it at last. It surely had been made for Jim and no one else. There was no other like it in any of the stores, and she had turned all of them inside out. It was a platinum fob chain simple and chaste in design, properly proclaiming its value by substance alone and not by meretricious ornamentation--as all good things should do. It was even worthy of The Watch. As soon as she saw it she knew that it must be Jim's. It was like him. Quietness and value--the description applied to both. Twenty-one dollars they took from her for it, and she hurried home with the 87 cents. With that chain on his watch Jim might be properly anxious about the time in any company. Grand as the watch was, he sometimes looked at it on the sly on account of the old leather strap that he used in place of a chain.

When Della reached home her intoxication gave way a little to prudence and reason. She got out her curling irons and lighted the gas and went to work repairing the ravages made by generosity added to love. Which is always a tremendous task, dear friends--a mammoth task.

Within forty minutes her head was covered with tiny, close-lying curls that made her look wonderfully like a truant schoolboy. She looked at her reflection in the mirror long, carefully, and critically.

"If Jim doesn't kill me," she said to herself, "before he takes a second look at me, he'll say I look like a Coney Island chorus girl. But what could I do--oh! what could I do with a dollar and eighty- seven cents?"

At 7 o'clock the coffee was made and the frying-pan was on the back of the stove hot and ready to cook the chops.

Jim was never late. Della doubled the fob chain in her hand and sat on the corner of the table near the door that he always entered. Then she heard his step on the stair away down on the first flight, and she turned white for just a moment. She had a habit for saying little silent prayer about the simplest everyday things, and now she whispered: "Please God, make him think I am still pretty."

The door opened and Jim stepped in and closed it. He looked thin and very serious. Poor fellow, he was only twenty-two--and to be burdened with a family! He needed a new overcoat and he was without gloves.

Jim stopped inside the door, as immovable as a setter at the scent of quail. His eyes were fixed upon Della, and there was an expression in them that she could not read, and it terrified her. It was not anger, nor surprise, nor disapproval, nor horror, nor any of the sentiments that she had been prepared for. He simply stared at her fixedly with that peculiar expression on his face.

Della wriggled off the table and went for him.

"Jim, darling," she cried, "don't look at me that way. I had my hair cut off and sold because I couldn't have lived through Christmas without giving you a present. It'll grow out again--you won't mind, will you? I just had to do it. My hair grows awfully fast. Say `Merry Christmas!' Jim, and let's be happy. You don't know what a nice-- what a beautiful, nice gift I've got for you."

"You've cut off your hair?" asked Jim, laboriously, as if he had not arrived at that patent fact yet even after the hardest mental labor.

"Cut it off and sold it," said Della. "Don't you like me just as well, anyhow? I'm me without my hair, ain't I?"

Jim looked about the room curiously.

"You say your hair is gone?" he said, with an air almost of idiocy.

"You needn't look for it," said Della. "It's sold, I tell you--sold and gone, too. It's Christmas Eve, boy. Be good to me, for it went for you. Maybe the hairs of my head were numbered," she went on with sudden serious sweetness, "but nobody could ever count my love for you. Shall I put the chops on, Jim?"

Out of his trance Jim seemed quickly to wake. He enfolded his Della. For ten seconds let us regard with discreet scrutiny some inconsequential object in the other direction. Eight dollars a week or a million a year--what is the difference? A mathematician or a wit would give you the wrong answer. The magi brought valuable gifts, but that was not among them. This dark assertion will be illuminated later on.

Jim drew a package from his overcoat pocket and threw it upon the table.

"Don't make any mistake, Dell," he said, "about me. I don't think there's anything in the way of a haircut or a shave or a shampoo that could make me like my girl any less. But if you'll unwrap that package you may see why you had me going a while at first."

White fingers and nimble tore at the string and paper. And then an ecstatic scream of joy; and then, alas! a quick feminine change to hysterical tears and wails, necessitating the immediate employment of all the comforting powers of the lord of the flat.

For there lay The Combs--the set of combs, side and back, that Della had worshipped long in a Broadway window. Beautiful combs, pure tortoise shell, with jewelled rims--just the shade to wear in the beautiful vanished hair. They were expensive combs, she knew, and her heart had simply craved and yearned over them without the least hope of possession. And now, they were hers, but the tresses that should have adorned the coveted adornments were gone.

But she hugged them to her bosom, and at length she was able to look up with dim eyes and a smile and say: "My hair grows so fast, Jim!"

And then Della leaped up like a little singed cat and cried, "Oh, oh!"

Jim had not yet seen his beautiful present. She held it out to him eagerly upon her open palm. The dull precious metal seemed to flash with a reflection of her bright and ardent spirit.

"Isn't it a dandy, Jim? I hunted all over town to find it. You'll have to look at the time a hundred times a day now. Give me your watch. I want to see how it looks on it."

Instead of obeying, Jim tumbled down on the couch and put his hands under the back of his head and smiled.

"Dell," said he, "let's put our Christmas presents away and keep 'em a while. They're too nice to use just at present. I sold the watch to get the money to buy your combs. And now suppose you put the chops on."

The magi, as you know, were wise men--wonderfully wise men--who brought gifts to the Babe in the manger. They invented the art of giving Christmas presents. Being wise, their gifts were no doubt wise ones, possibly bearing the privilege of exchange in case of duplication. And here I have lamely related to you the uneventful chronicle of two foolish children in a flat who most unwisely sacrificed for each other the greatest treasures of their house. But in a last word to the wise of these days let it be said that of all who give gifts these two were the wisest. Of all who give and receive gifts, such as they are wisest. Everywhere they are wisest. They are the magi. Untitled
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Im Not Emeril · Merry Christmas Merry Christmas While I Think I Will Miss This One This Year RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

Once again I'm being flooded with searches for something like "merry christmas merry christmas while i think i will miss this one this year". I now know just what it is you guys are looking for, so here it is...

"Bah, humbug!" No, that's too strong
'Cause it is my favorite holiday
But all this year's been a busy blur
Don't think I have the energy

To add to my already mad rush
Just 'cause it 'tis the season.
The perfect gift for me would be
Completions and connections left from

Last year, ski shop,
Encounter, most interesting.
Had his number but never the time
Most of '81 passed along those lines.

So deck those halls, trim those trees
Raise up cups of Christmas cheer,
I just need to catch my breath,
Christmas by myself this year.

Calendar picture, frozen landscape,
Chilled this room for twenty-four days,
Evergreens, sparkling snow
Get this winter over with!

Flashback to springtime, saw him again,
Would've been good to go for lunch,
Couldn't agree when we were both free,
We tried, we said we'd keep in touch.

Didn't, of course, 'til summertime,
Out to the beach to his boat could I join him?
No, this time it was me,
Sunburn in the third degree.

Now the calendar's just one page
And, of course, I am excited
Tonight's the night, but I've set my mind
Not to do too much about it.

Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I'll miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I'll miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I'll miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I'll miss this one this year.

Hardly dashing through the snow
Cause I bundled up too tight
Last minute have-to-do's
A few cards a few calls
'Cause it's r-s-v-p
No thanks, no party lights
It's Christmas Eve, gonna relax
Turned down all of my invites.

Last fall I had a night to myself,
Same guy called, halloween party,
Waited all night for him to show,
This time his car wouldn't go,

Forget it, it's cold, it's getting late,
Trudge on home to celebrate
In a quiet way, unwind
Doing Christmas right this time.

A&P has provided me
With the world's smallest turkey
Already in the oven, nice and hot
Oh damn! Guess what I forgot?

So on with the boots, back out in the snow
To the only all-night grocery,
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
In the line is that guy I've been chasing all year!

"I'm spending this one alone," he said.
"Need a break; this year's been crazy."
I said, "Me too, but why are you?
You mean you forgot cranberries too?"

Then suddenly we laughed and laughed
Caught on to what was happening
That Christmas magic's brought this tale
To a very happy ending!

Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn't miss this one this year!
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn't miss this one this year!



UPDATE:
The video I had here originally was pulled by YouTube, this one, while not quite as good, is the best I could find. Untitled
line 3 column 2550 - Warning: unescaped & or unknown entity "&P"
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line 3 column 3638 - Warning: unescaped & or unknown entity "&hl"
line 3 column 3644 - Warning: unescaped & or unknown entity "&fs"
line 3 column 3651 - Warning: discarding unexpected </param>
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line 3 column 3757 - Warning: discarding unexpected </param>
line 3 column 3813 - Warning: unescaped & or unknown entity "&hl"
line 3 column 3819 - Warning: unescaped & or unknown entity "&fs"
line 3 column 3765 - Warning: <embed> is not approved by W3C
line 3 column 4140 - Warning: <img> lacks "alt" attribute

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Better'n Facebook? Depends On How You Decide To Use It RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

There is a new "social network" available to conservative, Republican folk. Let me be the first to proclaim it better'n Facebook in that it is comprised of only your conservative Republican friends.

Ironically, it was a Facebook connection that steered me toward the RPV Network. I'm glad I followed that link down the rabbit hole. Go by the RPV Network and join up if you are a Republican and proud of it.

Then request a friend to join as well. Untitled
line 3 column 621 - Warning: <img> lacks "alt" attribute

Republican, ODBA, Valley

Im Not Emeril · Back Online RSS Comment Feed Bookmark on del.icio.us

I'm back online after a few weeks suffering from a serious virus infection.

This one was devious. It prevented any connection with any of my anti-virus software websites for updates, it prevented most anti-virus software from even running, it kept popping up Internet Explorer (which I never use) windows. It pretty much had me dead in the water.

I've managed to remove most of this infection manually, but vestiges of the virus remain. Anyway, I'm back online now and working more or less normally. Untitled
line 3 column 593 - Warning: <img> lacks "alt" attribute

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